The Abiding Never Ends

Because I don't know when I'll be returning to China or Tibet (hopefully by the time my students graduate next summer), and now that I'm back in Louisiana semi-permanently, it doesn't make sense to continue writing at here at Kham Abiding. On the other hand, I've made it through the obligatory readjustment period, and as such don't have a good excuse not to be writing at the moment. There's just too much goin' on, ya' herd?

That said, look for me to be helping fill out the content over at Cenlamar. The nature of that blog is considerably less personal than this one has been. But now that I'm back in the United States, I no longer have anything interesting or exotic to say about my personal life anyway, right?

If  you'd like to get in touch with me, leave a comment to this or any post and it will end up in my email account.  Or you can hit me up directly, dantsmith at gmail dot com.

Thanks for reading.

Peace like a river,
Daniel

ps: "Strikes and gutters, ups and downs."

Four Easy Steps to Khampa Machismo

Step One: Grow Mustache

Step Two: Rustle Yak

Step Three: Acquire Large Sunglasses

Step Four: Cultivate Belly

I have these pictures and others from this year up at Picasa.

Independence Day

Today I worked hard to get off the job as quickly as possible, like A Good American.

I finished giving the exam at 10am, had it graded by 2pm, and turned in the students' scores by three. I cleaned and dicked around for an hour, and then went to say goodbye to the students and turn in my key.

The students had already begun their computer exam, so bag on my back I only saw them from outside the room. None of them noticed me. I didn't really give them a proper goodbye after their exam in the morning, but a part of me felt it was better to slip out when their minds were on other things. A lot of the girls cried at our year-end party the other week, and I didn't see any reason to uncork a small river before their examination. I returned my key, negotiated my phone bill with the building manager, and found a car to Kangding.

Besides, I've always kind of sucked at goodbyes. I get reminded of change fairly often, but have difficulty expressing the right emotion at the right time. I am most sentimental in periods of great comfort, ingenuous when parting, and usually don't realize how much people mean to me until after the situation has changed.

I'm feeling, again, the regret that comes from making the right choice.

I now have a bus ticket to Ganzi, halfway to Yushu (Qinghai Province, a part of Amdo) where another Bridge Fund teacher Jon and our old friend Meg are to meet me. After spending a few days with them, I'll drop back down into Kham and see a few more students before starting the long journey back to America. I'll try to be on my email from time to time.

Upon boarding the bus from Chengdu yesterday, a very outgoing Chinese man dressed in sweat shorts and a red fleece bordered by gold cloth began talking with me very directly. I felt he was probably a Rinpoche, and he confirmed this after some time. He was recognized seventeen years ago, when he was in Beijing. This Rinpoche is not Tibetan. He had a broad smile, unhinged and young for his age. The burst blood vessel in his eye gave him an impressive countenance.

He blessed and gave me his mala, small prayer beads made of yak bone. He told me he counted five different prayers: Guru Rinpoche Padmasambava, Avalokitesvara, Manjusri, Green Tara, and one other that escapes me at the moment. He told me he declined to say the prayers for wealth that he usually offers Chinese people. I gave him the black plastic mala given to me by a student in return, and a Kalachakra Mantra sticker I bought as a gift for someone at home.

Rinpoche had been to Europe and was clearly very hip to Western youth. I've had a question on my mind, and I told him that I have been thinking of getting a tattoo of some Buddhist iconography. I'm afraid that my motivation is not correct.

He immediately began performing a mo (ritual divination) in his bus seat, and after some time he told me that he had visualized Manjusri, with his blue sword and red lotus, and that if I liked I should tattoo the sword on my right shoulder and the lotus on my left.


The sword cuts through the obscuration that prevents us from understanding the wisdom of compassion. This thanka is for that Rinpoche, and also for my students, whose thirst for knowledge may never be matched by the apparitions of our world.

Bridge Fund Dot Org

I hope to complete my final report tomorrow morning, though I still have a tutorial, three classes, and a test to get through before I can really say I'm finished. Even then I'll need to incorporate the scores into my report, and I haven't even started the thirty-odd student evaluations I need to write.

Now that I'm wrapping things up, it's nice that the Bridge Fund, an organization for which I am technically only a contractor, has finally gotten its website running (please take heed, those of you who have followed the link in my sidebar and found only a picture of a yak-hair tent and an "under construction" notice).



I really encourage you to look through the new site if you have time, especially the photo gallery. They really did a remarkable job.

SMITH/DANIEL MR 18JUL 2007

It's going to be a very long Wednesday.

CHINA AIR        18JUL HONGKONG TAIPEI        125P 305P
CI 608       WEDNESDAY HK INTL  TAIWAN TAOYUAN
                        
CHINA AIR        18JUL TAIPEI   LOSANGELES CA 440P 135P
CI 6         WEDNESDAY TAOYUAN  INTL
                  
CONTINENTAL AIR  18JUL L.A.     HOUSTON TX    455P 1007P
CO 541       WEDNESDAY INTL     G.BUSH INTERCO

CONTINENTAL AIR  18JUL HOUSTON  NEW ORLEANS  1055P 1158P
CO 1416      WEDNESDAY BUSH INT LOUIS ARMSTRONG 

             

Discover Kham Tour

One of my students is arranging tours this summer, and I agreed to pass the information along. Dorje is standing in the background at right. His mother is grinning as she offers conifer branches to the buddhas. Cath Marsh, one of his former instructors, is helping him arrange the tours.

15-day Discover Eastern Tibet Tour
July 1 and Aug 1 2007

Dorge invites travelers to join personalized small-group tours to western China’s exotic Tibetan prefecture. The tour will begin and end in Chengdu, the capital city of Sichuan, with ten full days spent in Kham (Ganzi Tibetan Autonomous Prefecture), offering a glimpse of one of China’s largest cities, insights into Tibetan culture, outdoor leisure activities and relaxation in peaceful environs.

Highlights:

• Chengdu: Panda Research Base
• Kangding: Tibetan-Chinese border town.
• Tagong Village and grassland
• Tibetan monastery visits and introduction to Tibetan Buddhism
• Day-hike or horse ride to mountain hot springs and lake in the lower regions of Mt. Jara (5,200m)
• Tawu, where we will enjoy a stay at Dorge’s family home - a rustic Tibetan farmhouse built in the traditional architectural style for which the town is renowned.
• Zhaba: a remote village home to a small community of people whose unique language and culture are on the brink of disappearance.


Tour group size is 5-6 persons.

Kham is a developing area and though we make every effort to ensure guests are as comfortable as possible, this tour is not for the faint of heart. Facilities in the remote areas we visit are basic and hot showers not always available. Mild high altitude discomfort is also a possibility.

Tour dates: July 1 – 15 (book before June 8)
August 1 – 15 (book before July 1)

***Tour prices: We have designed 2 travel options and for each tour will arrange whichever there is more interest in.
Comfort Travel (4-WD Land Cruiser transport and 3 star hotels in cities)
US$1,350 per person
Budget Travel (Van transportation and hostel accommodation) US$850

Prices include Chengdu airport pick up, transport, accommodation,
interpretation and tour services, and 2 meals a day.

For inquiries and a detailed travel itinerary, please email Cath cathmarsh@hotmail.com.

Click the Pretty Pictures

A couple of months ago, I mentioned that I had contributed an article to the second edition of Sichuan Travel Magazine.


Matt sent me these layout captures before he had finished editing, so please excuse any errors. In the article, I recollect the highlights of celebrating the icy Lunar New Year in the log cabins of my nomadic students. I never made the time to write about that experience on the blog, so I'm glad I put it in an article. The photo below is of the monastery in Daofu, taken by Kiwi Cath Marsh.

Click the pages to expand them large enough to read the type.


The magazine is designed and edited by Matt Vegh. Matt also administers iHotPot.com, a forum on life in Chengdu. This page from Chronicles of the Shu Kingdom (especially the lower panels; click to view in detail) demonstrate his skill as an illustrator.

Do you think your Wu-Tang sword can defeat me?

Out of Pocket

I finished grading the midterm this evening. I made it difficult so I could see where the students are, and as usual, I'm pleasantly surprised with two-thirds of them and disappointed with the rest.

Tomorrow begins a week vacation. A few students whose hometowns are within a day's journey of Kangding have invited me to spend time with their families. I'm looking forward to sitting around on the grassland again. The days have promised to be sunny and the nights still.

It's been busy but good times of late. Tenzin and I went swimming in a heated pool outdoors yesterday afternoon, protected from the rain by a cheap awning. He told me it snowed the day before. We drank some beers and swam laps. The place was nearly empty.

Returning from the holiday will bring a real reorientation with respect to the class. My students, the Tibetan Department, and the Bridge Fund all know I'm not planning to return next year. Before the term ends, I will have two solid months of class (six days a week), which isn't too long to begin counting the days until I turn in their grades and submit my final report to the Bridge Fund.

I'm feeling good about returning to Louisiana. At this point I'm more confident about living deliberately than I have in years. In spite of that, I can't help feeling that rebuilding an American life is going to be more difficult than I remember. It's like I'm starting from scratch, and I am free.

Just Relax, Take it Easy, You're Still Young, That's Your Fault

This picture of Maowei and Tenzin is merely a pretty image for you to appreciate. It does not relate to the following.

It took me all week to catch up with school after going to Chengdu last weekend. Chengdu was being resistant, and my lame errands felt especially difficult to accomplish. China's beginning to get to me in that way again. I'll be happy when I'm back in Louisiana. America is inefficient, but in much more familiar ways.

Last semester, when I used the middle school books, we had time for decent activities and casual explanation. This term's high school books are solid, but with four months to teach a year of material there's never enough time for fun stuff. Every week they read newspapers, writing letters, essays, rewrites and diaries, and the first ten minutes of class is devoted to speeches. It was getting to be too much even for me.

I realized on my first break from class since the semester began that I wasn't being efficient enough with the student's time. The term is over in two months, and it's basically my last chance to pull some of the lower students out of a slump before I leave. Some of them have gotten so much better since I came, and some of them act as if they haven't learned a thing.

That said, I've shifted most of my blogging energy to Cenlamar, where I hope to raise the profile of interesting stories and issues relating to Central Louisiana. I am also receiving a week off for the People's Labor Holiday next week. I'll be traveling west to a few students' homes for the vacation.

Yesterday I taught a unit on musical styles. It was nice to have fun in class again. The listening tape for the book played a few American songs for the students, including John Lennon's So This Is Christmas and Father and Son by Cat Stevens. I had them listen closely to Cat's words on the second listening, which also got me listening closely to the song's lyrics,

But take your time, think a lot,
Why, think of everything you've got.
For you will still be here tomorrow,
But your dreams may not.

The backs of my eyeballs began to get hot. Named Dekji lowered her face to hide her wet eyes. These students, especially my girls, think a lot about their friends, families, and what will happen after high school graduation. They open up to me in their diaries in the most amazing ways. They're Tibetan, but they always remind me of me (us) at that age.

Now that Blogspot is not being blocked at the moment, I'm going to begin posting student essays. It will give them a big kick to see their words online in English, and the rest of you will be able to get a glimpse into why I've grown so attached to these teenagers.

Wise Guys

I usually don't post about this kind of silliness (especially when it's already been hyped here and here), but if you have two minutes to kill you might find this amusing.

Mafia Name Generator

I put in "Daniel Smith," and was duly dubbed Lonely Guy. That describes me fairly well, but it's kinda non-specific. I wanted to give it another try, so I entered "Dan Smith."

The nickname generator divined to the sky and bestowed upon me a new handle: The Yak. I was floored. Not only am I always with Tibetans these days, but I am also a stalwart, gregarious, and hairy beast of burden.

This website must have been coded by the Oracle herself.

¡Moustachio Imbroglio! - Updated

Meg, whom I introduced in this post, visited me last week on her way from Chengdu back to Qinghai Province. She's an English teacher working at a school established by her Lama. She helped me with these photos (old news to my Facebook friends):

dan the dirty stinking hippie

Poppycock! I daresay a hooligan indeed, Governor. Cheerio!

Fulfillin' a lifelong dream, ya'll

Bold Vision into the Future: Terra Incognita

Update: Big thanks to those who voted. The results of the poll are as follows:

• Frank Zappa: 0
• John Holmes: 2
• Anthony van Dyke: 1
• The Hoff: 3

Working Overtime

This weekend, an article I wrote was accepted by the Sichuan Travel Guide Magazine, a quarterly magazine which was recently started by the administrator of iHotPot.com. The article will be published in about a month in their Spring edition. iHotPot (titled the Shu Kingdom Guide) is a forum for expats primarily living in Chengdu. I, of course, do not live in Chengdu, and my piece focuses on my experiences celebrating the frigid Tibetan New Year with the nomads of the Zongta Grassland.

Losar marked the beginning of the Year of the Fire Boar, and isn't that little SuperPig cute?

I will post the article here after the publication hits the stands. It will also be available on iHotPot.com at that time. If anyone would like to read the unedited draft before then (Mom), please email me and I'll send it to you in the good faith that you will not scoop the magazine.

Festival Season

I consider February to be the real Holiday Season.

February 2: Groundhog Day
February 12: President\'s Day
February 14: Valentine\'s Day
February 17: Lunar New Year (Tibet, China)
February 19: Lundi Gras
February 20: Mardi Gras
February 24: My birthday

It just gets better and better.

Hi, Mom

Mike's got some more good pictures up at kilgoresmith.blogspot.com

My Address

I'm not as far away as you think:

[Aside]

[My internet service provider no longer seems willing or able to connect me to blogspot.com. Apparently, the powers that be have discovered some of the reactionary and/or rightist propaganda I view and contribute on online journals such as Cenlamar, WeSawThat, KilgoreSmith, CenlaAntics and MediaGangBang.

Fortunately, accessing blogger.com is no trouble at all, so I do not foresee any difficulty in continuing to update this website. On the other hand, proxify.com is not blocked, so I will continue to read these blogs as I see fit. However, until I find an IP cloaker that will allow me to post content in addition to reading it, I won't be able to contribute to the online discussions.

Thanks Proxify! And Fkuc Yuo hCenise voGrennemt!]



UPDATE: I have found that NinjaIP runs cleanly and allows webposting. I'm back.

Internet Established

Late this morning a tech from the Dianxin Ju (electric letters office) in Guza and a Kangding Teacher's College collegue named Chenbo met with me in my flat to set up my ADSL connection. The speed is acceptable and reliable, and as I had planned I am establishing this thread so that interested persons like my mother can keep track of my goings-on. I envisioned this site, as well as it's title, during a recent trip to the Kham countryside with a student of mine, Dorje. After teaching for a mere two weeks, one and a half billion Chinese people and I celebrated Chinese National Day with a week off of work (a true seven days, with work on Saturday and the following Sunday, so that no student comrade can enjoy the coveted American double weekend nine-day Thanksgiving/Easter recess). In the course of enjoying Dorje's hospitality I ended a two-plus year hiatus from my love of dirt, woodstoves and mountain hail, the elementals of inspiration. I almost named this blog Twinspiration, but I feared that invoking the spirit of my facsimile might have unmasked the fact that this journal is a facsimile of his. Of course I miss him mightily, and I'd due well to be more like him, the Able to my Cain, the firstborn twin, the right-hander to my sinister left-handedness.
I hope to use the next few posts to detail, day by day, my vacation. Do not worry, I would not subject a reader to such minute tedium unless I believed it revealed something interesting, or true, about myself or the nature of my experience. On the other hand, because you cannot read as I write, at this moment I am imaginary to you, as you are imaginary to me. By my count (and my hermeunetics may be off), there is at least a threefold mediation of language from what I perceived and what you understand, discounting electronic factors:

a) events occur in conventionally assigned objective reality, in the Chinese countryside,
b) I construct them as meaningful and construct a narrative of experience to myself,
c) I type what I can remember from that primary narrative,
d) and you compare my adjectives and similes to experiences you have narrated about yourself.

This observation serves as both an introduction and a disclaimer. I wanted to get that out, and I promise I won't resort to such heady discourse for a while. I haven't written much lately, and I've been teaching grammar on a daily basis. I intend for the following recollection of adventure to be substantially more compelling.

Yours